


your words will be like mourning

by FancifulRivers



Category: Death Note
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Bittersweet, Jealousy, M/M, Misa-Centric
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-16
Updated: 2015-08-16
Packaged: 2018-04-15 00:59:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 546
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4587006
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FancifulRivers/pseuds/FancifulRivers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Misa's alone, and she knows it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	your words will be like mourning

**Author's Note:**

> I do not and never will own Death Note.
> 
> I haven't written Misa before. I don't hate her, I actually feel kind of sorry for her. She deserved better than Light.

The light is still on in the work room, but Misa knows better than to peek in there. It's late enough that only Ryuzaki and Light are still awake, and if they're awake, that means only one thing. And one time of watching her supposed boyfriend swap spit and much more with the lanky-limbed, sugar-addicted detective was more than enough. She has no desire to see Light kiss another, to hear him moan in that raw, breathless way that he's never managed around her.

Instead, she sits down in the hallway, tugging her skirt down so it's covering her knees. The floor is cold, but she ignores the chill seeping through her clothes, scraping along her bones. 

He's supposed to love her, but she's not willful enough anymore to believe that he does. She's not stupid enough to pretend that she loves him anymore, either. She loves Kira. She loves the  _idea_ of him, but the truth of Yagami Light is as hollow as a papier-mâché cut-out. He's a balloon that's filled her hollow spaces for so long, but  now he's popped, and she's forced to recognize just how empty she really is.

He's different now, too, and she can't pretend that away, either. He's happier. Lighter, if her mind will forgive the pun. Without the memories of being Kira, he's a whole different person and she wonders if he even recognizes the lack. There's a warmth in his eyes wholly unfeigned, and a tilt to his smile that suggests perhaps everything will get better.

It's not going to though, and she knows it, and the thought makes her feel queasy. He's going to kill Ryuzaki and he's going to pretend it doesn't matter. And maybe it doesn't when he's Kira, but he isn't  _just_ Kira, and Ryuzaki isn't  _just_ L. He's not going to be the last person Light kills, but Misa thinks he might be the most meaningful. And with Light's heart scribbled down in those grim pages, what else will die in Light's eyes?

If he gets his hands on the Death Note again, he will remember, and his memory will be his undoing. Misa sighs, letting her head fall back against the wall, ignoring the shivers that tremble through her body. The sound resonates through the quiet building and she hears footsteps, hears a door creak open, and when she looks up again, Light and Ryuzaki are there. 

"Are you all right, Misa?" Ryuzaki asks, slouched over and peering into her eyes with unsettling intensity.

"Misa is fine!" she chirps with forced brightness. She knows L sees through it, but she thinks perhaps Light doesn't want to, and the thought stings. "Misa can't sleep though, would Light like to help Misa sleep?" 

"Of course, just let me finish up in there," Light replies courteously, and a stab of envy splinters through her when she sees the regret in his eyes aimed at the slightly disheveled detective beside him. As he turns away, Misa leaps up, grabbing L's elbow and pulling him down to her.

" _Don't ever let him touch the Death Note,_ " she hisses in his ear, and confusion and understanding mingle and war on his face as she stands up and claps her hands.

"Light!" she trills, and follows after him.


End file.
